I did not become a drunk overnight. My problem(s) began at the ripe old age of 11…yes 11. However, one day I woke up and said enough is enough. I am done. Two weeks prior to that decision, this is how bad it had become. Before your alarm went off, I had already consumed a six pack. Before lunch, I was up to a twelve pack, sometimes eighteen, while you were contemplating your first cold one on your lunch break after a rough morning at work. In the afternoon, I would consume a six pack of sixteen ounce beers. Just before rush hour traffic, I would make a run to the gas station for an eighteen pack and several fatties, my term for 24oz beers. On days ending in “Y”, I would usually make another beer run in the evening. I would plan out my night so I would have several beers left for when I would wake up at 2am and 4am. Several hours later the vicious cycle would start all over again. Who does that…who lives like that? Me. I did.
I was somehow blessed with genes that have allowed me to at least resemble an athlete even during those times that my daily exercise routine was raising my hand for the bartender. And I was also blessed with the ability get back in shape fairly easily if so desired. I have been a competitive Division III basketball player turned two hundred plus pound bar hopping beer enthusiast to competing in the CrossFit games in 2009 where I was in the best shape of my life. And I did so with a cold Miller Lite in one hand and a cooler of Miller over my shoulder.
Alcohol, especially beer and tequila, are widely used substances by crossfitters everywhere. I am not saying that every crossfitter drinks, so don’t interpret it that way. No matter how much diet is preached by owners and athletes alike, drinking still exists. I haven’t personally done any kind of scientific study on this matter; but take a brief moment to count the number of competitions that serve beer … like the CrossFit Games. Hell, the regional competition that I competed in twice offered free beer (the good old days in Fort Worth). There are boxes that regularly have a happy hour or a girl’s night out. And the simple fact that there are CrossFit workouts (WOD’s) that incorporate beer drinking, whether sanctioned by CrossFit HQ or not, they do exist. I have personally participated in the Century WOD and have done a chugging Grace faster than a lot of people can complete the thirty reps alone. I do not condone lifting a bar overheard and drinking, so again do not interpret that statement as “I dare you to go out and try this”. Maybe I should put a disclaimer on this damn thing. Before Reebok, when CrossFit t-shirts were cool and original, there was a St. Patty’s Day shirt that highlighted green beer and burpees with a WOD printed on the inside. Although my problem did not begin with CrossFit, drinking was made easy and I didn’t have to explain the constant presence of Miller Lite in my hand. In my Level 1 Certification picture, I had a beer in my hand and no one wondered or asked why. In fact, I became well known in the local crossfitting community for being that person, the one that always had a beer in hand (or both hands) and would only be questioned when I didn’t have one, regardless of the time of day. I have to say it sure as hell was fun to be fit as fuck and drunk all the time…kind of a former dream come true for me.
My first CrossFit gym was in its infancy when I joined but soon became the place to be for many top athletes as well as late night partiers, and I fit right in. I was barely into my second week of CrossFit before I showed up to a 6am class after a late night of drinking with my favorite bartenders. In other words, I was drunk. As the gym grew, so did the parties and party goers. Friday classes turned into workouts to burn off the calories that would be consumed later on that night. Saturday classes turned into a “who could sweat out the most alcohol WOD” followed by a beer run before lunch. In each instance, I learned that I could WOD with the best of ‘em sober or drunk. So my workouts were as follows: Mornings = hung over and probably had a beer on the way, Noon = got a good lunchtime buzz going, Evenings = already consumed at least a 12 pack. And at my peak, I did two WODs a day…I will leave it to the imagination to total those beers consumed.
Competition to me was to have the best time or rounds for
the day, and then out drink everyone and be the last one standing at
night. In my mind, that was success…that
and being the athlete cheered for in the ’09 Games solely for wearing a tank
that said “I love Beer”. At the Games as
well as Regional’s, I sure as hell wasn’t the best athlete as far as workouts
go but I guarantee I was the last one standing at the end of the night. After all, I am competitive and was determined
to win at something. After four WODs and
countless beers at the ranch, there was a team celebration at the beer tent
followed by dinner with ice cold tall boys.
After dinner, we returned to the ranch (with
beer) to hang out on center court while the pull-up rigs were being assembled
for the final day of competition, and to watch a televised fight on the
jumbo-tron. For what it is worth,
this one single day in Aromas ranks near the top for “best day ever”…and
somehow this drunk remembers almost every moment.
Do I miss CrossFit…yes! All in all it was just something that I had
to walk away from in order to begin to get my life back on track and deal with
drinking and depression, a combo that can have some serious consequences. WODing drunk, coaching drunk, drinking on the
way to the gym, on the way home and usually at the gym…it was all a time bomb
with a fuse that was getting shorter by the day. Anyone want to see me do a three and half
minute Fran on YouTube after chugging three 24oz beers? Here is the link:http://youtu.be/TDn5cZ9n330
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