Waiting for the punch-line? Sorry to disappoint, but there actually isn't one. Instead, it is one of the single greatest moments in my drunk life! Now that I use the empty kegs for strongman training, I am reminded just about every day of this one moment.
At the time, I was a manager at an Office Depot on the north side of town. The shopping center was home to quite a few chain restaurants and it was fairly common to see beer trucks flying past the front of the store. On this particular day, I was in the store's receiving area when a co-worker came over the radio saying that I needed to come to the front..."there is beer in the street". I casually walked to the front thinking...what the hell is she talking about...did she say beer?! As I approached the front of the store, my co-worker and a female customer are pointing and looking outside. So of course, I had to get a better look. Sure as shit, there were two kegs laying in the middle of the main circle of the shopping center.
The generous customer offered to bring her vehicle around so I could load them in the back, but before she could finish her sentence, I was in a dead sprint to the kegs. Realizing I had no way of carrying them by myself, I returned to the store, grabbed a dolly, returned to the kegs, and loaded them up. I would have beat Carl Lewis in a 100m sprint that day. A few teenagers made a valliant effort in trying to snag them before me, but hell would freeze over before I let that happen.
I proudly wheeled my kegs straight through the front doors of the store to the receiving area. I passed by my boss who had a confused look on his face, and several customers who asked when Happy Hour started. As the story spread to more people around the store, my boss suggested that I load them into my car. We loaded them into the trunk of my poor little Saturn, which now looked like it was riding on the two back tires alone.
As it ends up, one keg was empty. The other...it was a full, ice cold keg of Dos Equis. And I was scheduled off the next day. Coincidence or not, there was about to be an impromptu keg party at the house! I called and text a handful of friends, and although no one believed what happened, they sure did show up that night to help me float the keg.
Oh! And as for the driver of the beer truck, maybe the next time he decided to drive full speed through the middle of a shopping center, he made an effort to check that all his doors were secured. Or maybe someone else ended up winning the beer lottery like I did!
Good times :)
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